feelings

Yesterday was so great. Belated Shabbat Shalom!
I took the Muni for the first time by myself to visit my Uncle and Cousin for lunch. We ate at Tartine's, a delicious and crowded bakery. Later we walked around Mission, shopped, got gelato. We also found a cute bookstore that had my painting of ballet feet:

Rob and Sienna in front of their sweet ride for the weekend:


Last night my roomies and I had a dinner/movie night. It was so much fun to just chill out in our apartment together. We watched Requiem for a Dream. It was so intense. I didn't like it at all. But I am pretty sure anyone who sees that will never use drugs. ever.

While I was on the Muni this morning, I found that the soundtrack for Juno was pretty great. Talk about a movie that is the opposite of intense. Honestly, it is so perfect, that little movie. Got a little worship with Phil Wickham in. I made friends with an Argentine man. His name is Rustian. I think. I wrote a little something something to pass the time:

I see a green home next to one with a cross displayed.The man next to me stairs gently ahead.
everyone on the bus look and looks ahead and no one speaks. The silence is broken by the tap of my shoe as I listen, listen to my music. Today is Freewheelin' tomorrow might be Best Of...
Now there is a child in front of me. He reads to himself. There is no time to be sad when your young. That's what they used to say at least. I make eye contact with a man who is divided from me by fiber glass and metal. He is a man of the street, wearing a white suit that is wrinkled from the long time gravel bed. He lifts his keys as if he is raising a glass of champagne. I nod and smile to him, but he does not see me. Nor does he need me really. I am just a passing face, a passing person, a passing soul. I'm on a bus. It's a snake, it's phallic, it's a song, it's a memory, it's dirty. Another man of the street is walking back and forth. He is black, black as the tires of my train. He wears a purple hat. He holds his hands as if he is calming someone down. He looks up and he looks down, but he never looks to the right or left.

I called my friend Remy last night for his birthday. He is 20. And is in India right now. After about an hour of trying to get international calling cards, I finally figured it out. Turned out I totally didn't need to pay $11 for it. But oh well. I think it really meant a lot to him that I did that. And it meant a lot to me too. I love him and his voice was so pleasing to listen to. Like an old friend. Just visiting.

I am reminded of feelings of satisfaction. Arriving at a destination that you did all by yourself. Going out of your way to wish someone well across the world. Writing, listening to music, listening to the rhythm of reality. It's nice to feel these things again. Call it an out of body experience. My days to come will change me, and my goal is that they are for the better.