no names

no names.

i am obsessed with a musician. and he's not a friend who happens to play music, he is legitimately a musician, touring in europe right now.

this is what i knew about him:
he has one brother.
grew up in pittsburg.
parents are blind and were divorced when he was young.
he got his masters degree in mental health psychology at a private school.
when writing his second album, he himself was going through a divorce.
and from the music from his third album, it sounds like he was unfaithful.
he can smoke a cigarette well and his beard is perfect.
he now lives in a very small town in illinois.
might be married now.

so i was looking at his pictures on myspace, dreaming about taking him to coffee when his tour came in to town. i would most likely take him to the coffee shop i love in the mission district. we would fit in. we would talk about our common love for sufjan stevens. we would talk about the spiritual undertones in his song "Mend Your Heart" and then i would wipe the dust from my croissant and he would have a little coffee on his lips. he would say that he got married the first time too young, but now he knows what he wants. we would fall in love and get married and live in new york where i was interning until i finished my graduate work. then we would move back to the small small town in illinois and live in a big/cheap empty house. he'd go back to work as a therapist and i would write articles and we'd make babies.

it was all working out fine until i noticed this one woman's name as the photographer of many of his photos. these photos are not just professional photos, they are more home-y, more relaxed. i thought to myself, if he had a wife, then i bet she took these pictures.

enter stalking skills:

i myspaced her name and narrowed down my search a few times, changing the age and hometown of this woman i didn't even know really truly existed. and then i found her. and yes, she is married to him. and now my dreams are shattered ;)

she is super cute. not too high maintenance, not too low. they look very happy in their pictures together.

he deserves someone like her i guess

...

now i think it's time i get a therapist for my addictive/obsessive/consuming habits.