"For a moment, she re-discovered the purpose of her life. She was here in earth to grasp the meaning of its wild enchantment and call each thing by its right name.” -Boris Pasternak

Thursday, September 17, 2009

I am a ...

My education to Jewish Studies began last night.

Sitting on the far left, as to plug in my mini laptop named "Tom" I listened and attentively took notes on my Jewish History until 1650 class. This class is three hours, once a week and taught by the Chair of the Jewish Studies Department who also teaches Jewish Studies and acts as my academic adviser. We have gotten past the horrible history bump of Empires such as Byzantine and entered into a discussion on the split of Christianity from Judaism.

I am a Messianic Jew.
Even writing the word, with "I am ..." terrifies me. I have been subject to so much intellectual and emotional criticism from Jews and Christians, the word has now become something I fear rather than a celebration of who I am. From Jews trying to retract my "Jewishness" and Christian's who contend after replacement theology, I am the middle man who no one wants around. I am the person who seems to cause trouble. Why can't I make up my mind? In the Christian community, it's fun and trendy to follow Yeshua. In the Jewish community, it's about rituals and tradition that make up the ideologies of the day. But here I am. One generation too late in the Messianic times to be a radical and one thought process behind for a popular methodology called evangelism. And to be reminded that I am a woman amongst non-egalitarian men is a another story.

I am a Messianic Jew.
There it is. It is rather beautiful. Eloquently written, rolls off the tongue like a cold glass of water after consuming too many rugelach. It's clean. When the community of Messianic believer's get together, you have the weird old and young people, the "royalty" and the people that have no idea what's going on. I understand this is a dramatic definition. There are the intellectuals and the leaders, the people who are not Jewish, the people who are too Jewish and the men and women who are hungry for freedom. Which one am I?

I am a Messianic Jew.
At some point this will come up to my Professor. He has to know. I would be lying and doing him an injustice if this never "came out." During lecture last evening, the class mulled over topics such as the Gospels written after the destruction of the second Temple, Jesus is irrelevant to Judaism because he did abolished the law and the apostle Paul living an oxymoron life (living according to law, but preaching that it is unnecessary). Here I am, sitting in the second row, farthest to the left, shaking in my boots. What do you say to your teacher who is a scholar and a Jew. What do you say to a class of twenty other students, half of which are Jewish and the other half secular history majors?

I am a Messianic Jew.
It starting to sound a little better. I rushed an email last night to my friend Kim who is a pastor in San Diego. What the heck!? I said, If what I heard tonight was true, then my own relationship with Gd has changed drastically! I look forward to her reply. I know it will be filled to the rim with wisdom and assurance. Then today asked my friend Aaron about the gospels being written after 70ce. I loved what he said. Well, yes, they were written after...unless you believe in prophecy. I can breathe easy. This afternoon I picked up David H. Stern's "Messianic Jewish Manifesto" a work of genius. I barely finished reading the first chapter and I began to weep. It's okay that I believe in what I do. I am allowed to disagree with people, even other Messianic Jews. It's okay that I am in a season where I am figuring this out and being assured, gaining knowledge and living in accordance to the true nature of Gd. Whom shall I fear?

My story is not finished. And that is okay too.

I am a Messianic Jew.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

I'm going to read that book this month too friend.

Hang in there. You are you. I like that.

Malka said...

wow. That means a lot to me Aaron.
Let me know when you start it. We'll have lots to talk about! You are too cool.

Unknown said...

Hello!

[To differentiate,]
First of all, The historical person was named Ribi Yehoshua. His name was later changed to Jesus.

Ribi Yehoshua – the Messiah – taught how to follow the Creator.
It is highly relevant for Christians whom want to follow the Messiah to know what was written in his authentic teachings. His authentic teachings were later redacted into the “gospel of Matthew”. In his true teachings one finds that he taught – just what is written in the Jewish Bible (which Christians calls the “GT”) – that humankind are required to do their utmost to keep the directives in Torah [“the books of Moses”] non-selectively. The followers of Ribi Yehoshua were called the Netzarim and their message was always antithetical to Christianity [note 1].

Furthermore, the historical Ribi Yehoshua was not an “incarnate man-god”, nor was he divine. He was not a “Son of God”. He was a spiritual son to the Creator, just like all Jews (implying Torah-observant) are. The Netzarim never accepted the “NT” since it contradicts Torah. Jew is defined in Torah, not as a race; but to the contrary one requirement to be a Jews is that one does ones utmost to keep the directives of Torah non-selectively. Thus “NT”-observance and “NT”-preaching implies that one is not a Jew, since “NT” contradicts Torah [note 2]. To be

Relating to the Creator exactly in the same way Ribi Yehoshua did – i.e. observing the Creators directives in the Torah – leads oneself into an intimate relationship with the Creator, which is very meaningful!

1.Statements proved on Netzarims website (only legitimate Netzairm-the Netzarim in Ra'anana),Netzarim
2.Proof of some contradictions: Link

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