IF

Events.

It's so funny how one can be influenced, isn't it? I was on a liberal role for a few weeks. I wasn't very gracious. I was obsessed with new history and I began to reform my beliefs about the past. Especially American Christian past. I forgot where I came from. Lucky for me, I have mentors in my life who speak wisdom and faithfulness. So I called to them. And they gave the best responses.

I awoke this morning to an idea. What if I go to Seminary for Graduate school? I looked at my options and it looks like I might move back to southern CA. This is the last thing in the world that I want to do. But my people are there. My resources are there. My family is there. ... It's something to think about.

I do believe now, however, that my role in the world is not to be poet. What I mean is, I will always be a poet, but I do not want to make money or go to school for it. I think my calling is Ministry. I just don't know what that entails. It might be messianic. It might be Presbyterian. It might mean abroad missions. It might mean inner city. It might be the suburbs.

I still have the community/foster house in my heart.

Events.

It's funny how yesterday I thought I didn't want to go to Church or even call myself a Christian. I was frustrated that my journey is so complicated. But that is okay. I decided I am going to Church tomorrow. I don't necessarily want to. But I am in the mood to worship. I wish I could go to a Synagogue and pray. I pray the best when I am there. But Church can be the second best thing.